Sunday, August 22, 2010

Early Job Ads

Okay folks, some early ads have appeared, one of which was written for me. Really and truly, someone must have been reading my CV when they wrote this ad, for it is everything I read, write, study, and love! As of today, I still have hope. This could, however, change at any moment. I'll be applying for jobs in my area of specialization, as well as generalist jobs. If the load is a 4/4 (rather than a 5/5), I will also apply to community college positions that offer the chance to teach literature (rather than all comp courses). The goal, of course, is for either myself or Hubby to land a tenure-track job back in the US. If we can get placed at the same school or schools in proximity to each other, then we're happy with taking visiting or short-term gigs. The hope is that being available for interview at our respective field's annual conferences (MLA for me, AHA for Hubby) will help us get to the campus visit stage despite the cost of international airfare. In this economy, though, who knows...and in this market, all sorts of weird things are happening. For example, one school is conducting interviews at a regional MLA conference in early November! Trying to get a jump on hiring the good people? Trying to hire before they get their money taken away? Both? Who knows...

All I know is: We Need Jobs in the US! Let the market season begin....

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Viriginity Cream

Seriously folks, I thought I'd seen it all. But yesterday, while browsing at a pharmacy in Doha, I saw Virginity Cream. Yes, you read that right. Well, being my inquisitive self, I had to pick up the box and read the packaging. According to box, the cream contains "special ingredients formulated for a woman's most sensitive areas," which will "strengthen and tighten the vaginal muscles," leaving one feeling "cleansed and refreshed" as well as "feeling tighter."

Wow. Oddly enough, there was no mention of the hymen. A colleague suggested that this is an "Asian thing," which I take to mean that it's a product purchased mostly by Asian women. However, given all the skin bleaching products I've seen here (usually called "fairing cream"), it seems that even Arab women make use of whatever products they feel might enhance their beauty or femininity.

I swear there's an academic essay in here if I only had the time to write it!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Oh, by the way


I really, truly did it...I don't think I believed 100% that it would happen until I heard them call my name. It was a very bittersweet moment because my advisor, quite unexpectedly, wasn't able to attend and hood me. Instead, my department chair stood in, and it was fine, but my advisor was sorely missed. I wish I could post pics, but none were taken. At least none by my family. I'm sad about this...They didn't want to stay for the entire 2+ hour ceremony (and I don't blame them), so Hubby to the little ones back to the hotel, and my Mom took my oldest daughter back as well. After the ceremony, there I was, all decked out in my hood and gown, with nobody to snap a shot. Le sigh. There was a professional photographer there on behalf of the university though, and I'm supposed to get an e-mail letting me know how to access the photo taken of me getting hooded.

None of us wanted to come back to Qatar. Check that. Eliza wanted to come back because she missed all her things, specifically her books (yes, just like her Mommy and Daddy). After 3 days on the road in three different hotels and a long day (and night) of both domestic and international flights, we finally returned safely to Doha, where our skin will now melt off our faces because of the heat. OMG the HEAT!!

I'm woefully unprepared for this semester's classes, but I shall take care of the shortly. The house is still a disaster area of unpacked things, and Eliza has taken out and played with nearly every toy, book, and craft she owns. She then proclaimed, "I love it here, and I don't ever want to go back to America!" For her, America equals the loss of her stuff (for it won't all fit in the suitcase). We explained that when we move back to America, all of her things will come with us.
Everyone's still trying to get their sleep schedules back to normal. I've been up since 3:00 a.m., and I know I'll pay for it later this evening. Hannah had a successful first day of 6th grade, despite being incredibly scared, anxious, and excited all the same time. I pray that she'll continue to do well, and I know much of her potential rests on my ability to help her get/stay organized at home (her bedroom, backpack, etc.). We still have lots to do over the next few weeks, so blogging may be light (like it isn't already?)....But I really want to blog more this semester, mainly to chronicle the job search process and hold myself to my academic goals of writing, revising, and submitting work.

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

I Take That as a No?

Yeah, so I haven't heard from the search committee, so I'm assuming I will not get an invitation for a campus visit. This sucks. I tried not to get my hopes up, but clearly I did, and it doesn't feel good to know they like someone else better (for whatever reason). I'm still going through all my answers and thinking about the ways I should have worded something differently, said this instead of that. Just knowing that I haven't made it to the next stage has really deflated me. Really. Deflated.

On top of the job thing coming out of the blue and then disappearing as quickly as it came, some family stuff came up that was pretty nasty. It's a long(-ish) story, but it boils down to being incredibly hurt by my little brother. He is still very much under the influence of my father, yet he doesn't realize this. My father continues to manipulate everyone around him, and while my brother thinks he's immune to it, he so very clearly is not. My father has told him lies about me (that I don't ever call him or return his calls, for example), which have contributed to my brother holding a certain judgment of me that's complete bullshit (not that it's okay to judge people in general, mind you). On top of this, my brother thinks I'm "cold-hearted" for not feeling obligated to maintain some sort of connection--even if it's just superficial--to the man who helped create me. The same man who abused me, brainwashed me, and in no way seeks to have any sort of parent-child relationship based on mutual honesty, respect, and love. Um, yeah, I don't want to have any relationship that isn't based, at least, on mutual respect and do so would be unhealthy and set an incredibly bad example for my daughters.

My brother? Agrees that my dad still can't be trusted and doesn't know how to be a parent, but still thinks I should feel compelled to have a relationship with him because he's my dad. No, I do not feel this. Haven't for a long time and probably never will, and it has nothing to do with forgiveness because that happened a long time ago. This has to do with him and his behavior now.

After the longest cry I've had in quite a while, Hubby helped me pull myself together, but I still can't shake the overwhelming sadness I feel about the job, my brother, having to go back to Doha, everything. For some reason, I'm also feeling completely unmotivated to do anything in terms of work, even though now more than ever, I need to get the things done that will help me most on the job market, and I only have 2 more work days before we start cleaning, packing, shipping, and travelling. I should be excited for graduation next week, but I'm not. I need to shake this funk, and it needs to happen quickly.